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Birth partner guide: how to support labour

A birth partner can make a big difference. Mia gives partners a calm guide to what to do and what to say.

In short

Read the birth plan together. You can speak up for the wishes when your partner is busy coping.

Offer water, massage, a cool cloth, a change of position and calm words.

Slow breathing from you helps. It is fine to ask the midwife to explain what is happening.

Eat, drink and take short breaks. You will be needed after the birth too.

Your job is to help the person in labour feel safe, calm and heard. You do not need to know everything. Being there and staying calm matters most.

Read the birth plan together, so you know what matters to them. Learn the signs of labour and know who to call.

Pack your own bag, with snacks, a charger, a change of clothes and money for parking.

Time contractions, offer food and drinks, and encourage rest. Keep things calm and low-key at home.

Offer water between contractions, a cool cloth, massage or firm pressure on the lower back. Help with position changes.

Speak softly and keep the room calm. Ask the midwife questions if you are not sure what is happening.

If something is offered, help your partner ask: what are the benefits, the risks, the alternatives, and what if we wait?

Be polite and calm. You are there to help them choose, not to choose for them.

Skin-to-skin is not just for the birthing parent. You can hold the baby too. Take photos if wanted, and help with the first feed.

Based on NHS guidance for birth partners and Cochrane evidence on continuous support in labour. Mia teaches. Your midwife knows you best.

Sources: NHS: Tips for birth partners · Cochrane review: Continuous support for women during childbirth

What if I feel faint at the birth?

Sit down and tell the midwife. It is common and nothing to be embarrassed about.

Should I speak up for my partner?

Yes, politely, about wishes you have talked through. Ask questions rather than argue.

What should I bring?

Snacks, a charger, a change of clothes and money for parking.